Eating Right

Eating right during pregnancy and breastfeeding really isn't tough. I just follow a few simple rules, some of which I borrowed from other people.

1. Eat food. Real food, not an edible food like product. If you can't pronounce the ingredients, put it back on the shelf and walk away. If it won't rot within a reasonable period of time, put it back.

2. Eat mostly plants. Animal products such as meat, cheese, etc. should be flavorings, not main ingredients. This is a tough one. Most people like meat. I'm vegetarian, but cheese is my downfall. I could happily eat a ton of cheese, every day. I have to work on this.

3. Don't eat so much. Eat until you aren't hungry, NOT until you're full. Again, this takes some will power but it makes a HUGE difference.

4. Listen to your body. If you want oatmeal, eat oatmeal. If you want cheese, eat cheese. Just not so much.

5. Eat dessert. If you don't, you'll be ticked off, angry and frustrated. Just follow the other rules as much as you can (i.e. buy ice cream that's real food, not an edible food like product and don't eat so much.)

6. Put as many colors as possible on your plate. The chemicals in the plants that make the different colors contain different vitamins. It's a simple thing that really works.

7. Whole grains. 'nuff said. Carbs are NOT evil. Overly processed carbs masquerading as real food are, but real carbs from whole grain are very healthy.

8. Buy organic greens (lettuce, spinach, etc), bell peppers, strawberries, milk and dairy products, and peaches. These are some of the most hormone and pesticide laden foods in our supermarkets. It's not vital to get all of your foods as organic. Do some research to find out how to get the most bang for your buck.

High Protein Pasta with Veggies

picture to be posted later

I'm going to post some of the recipes I've discovered and/or come up with. I need to eat much more protein than usual, and more veggies, so I've had to be creative. Here's what I'm making today. This makes several servings. I eat one and freeze the rest for later. It's easy, fairly quick and full of good stuff. These directions are for after you've had the child; if you're still pregnant the directions will be in parenthesis.

Whole wheat penne pasta
garbanzo beans (chick peas)
canned diced tomatoes
2 small yellow squash
2 small zuchinni
2 handfuls fresh spinach
italian seasoning (marjoram, rosemary, thyme, sage, oregano)

Change diaper. Nurse child. Get child to go to sleep. (If pregnant, go to bathroom).

Find your largest soup pot. Remove cat which is sleeping in pot. Wash pot.

Cook pasta according to directions for al dente, drain.

Pick up crying child. Sternly admonish cat that woke up child. Get child back to sleep. (If pregnant, go to bathroom).

In same pot, add olive oil. When it's hot, add squash and zucchini.

Check on crying child, change diaper. (If pregnant, go to bathroom).

Add salt, pepper and Italian seasoning to taste. Saute for a few minutes (2-3).

Add spinach and cook until spinach wilts.

While waiting for the spinach to wilt, check on crying child, walk around the house singing lullabies. (If pregnant, go to bathroom).

Add diced tomatoes and garbanzo beans.

Check on crying child, change diaper. Congratulate child on making such good poopies. (If pregnant, go to bathroom).

Cook until warm, stirring frequently. Taste and add seasoning if necessary. Add pasta.

Immediately put 4 portions in containers to freeze. Put another portion into a bowl that you will get to eat as soon as you get the child to sleep again. (If pregnant, go to the bathroom and enjoy your ability to eat when the food is still warm. **chuckles**)

8 Weeks Update

I am truly amazed at how quickly the time is passing, and how much we've all grown.

She's up to 11 pounds now, and wearing 0-3 month clothes. She can track us across a room so her eyesight has improved quite a bit. She smiles at us, and we have a new favorite game - making faces at each other. Daddy is very good at this game and the Pocket-sized Presidente finds this to be very amusing. She's trying very hard to laugh. She's also talking up a storm, with coos, goos, squeals, grunts and gargles. We're quite convinced she's talking, and if we were only fluent in Baby we could understand her.

Some fantastic friends threw us an "After Baby Shower" and the Miniature Monarch was ooh'ed and aww'ed over, held, loved and spoiled, as is her due. She was awarded several items of tribute, one of which was a playmat. She loves laying on it and smacking at the hanging toys. She's also newly interested in the hanging toys on her bouncy seat. When she wiggles and kicks, it moves the whole chair and makes the animals dance for her amusement. This is the one in the picture at the top of this post, which is still the best picture of her.

She's recently figured out how to suck on her hands, and she can get them into her mouth about half the time. The other half of the time they hit her in the face at which point she is NOT PLEASED and we must appease her.

At night she's sleeping for 3-5 hours at a stretch, which is a huge relief to me. She used to sleep for 1.5 - 2 hours, then nurse for 45-60 minutes. I was exhausted all the time. Now I actually get some sleep.

Speaking of which, she's napping. I should be too.

Silly Songs

I find myself singing to her all the time. Sometimes it's random songs I know, sometimes I make up lyrics to songs. I have officially degenerated to Mommy Brain - I'm singing songs about poo.

to the tune of 'Camptown Races'
It's time to change a diaper now
Do da, do da
It's time to change a diaper now
Oh the poopy face

Diapers full of pee pee
Diapers full of poopy
It's time to change a diaper now
All the live long day


to the tune of 'Jesus Loves Me'
My family loves me, this I know
'cause my mommy tells me so
Mommy and Daddy and both the cats
They love me and that's a fact

Yes, my family loves me
Yes, my family loves me
Yes, my family loves me
'cause my mommy tells me so.

same tune
My baby loves me this I know
For her smiles tell me so
Fussy crying and being up all night
Won't last forever so it's all right

Yes my baby loves me
Yes my baby loves me
Yes my baby loves me
For her smiles tell me so

Amusing Myself

I'm having fun coming up with new titles for the little one. A friend suggested I compile them, so here are her titles so far:

Tiny Overlord
Miniscule Majesty
Supreme Smallness
Picayune Potentate
Wee Worshipfulness
Petite Powerhouse
Diminutive Dictator
Lilliputian Ladyship
Tiny Tyrant
Bantam Baroness
Pint-sized Princess
Puny Presidente
Itty Bitty Baby Committee
CEO in Charge of Cuteness
Exceptionally Small Executive
Diminutive Dragonet
Bitty Banshee
Cranky Czarina
Runty Royalty

Twitter Haiku

For some reason, when posting to Twitter I often do it in the form of haiku. Thought I'd share the ones relating to the Picayune Potentate.

Spring brings welcome warmth
But also saying goodbye
To days spent with her.

Quiet morning time
Watch my child as she nurses
World around us sleeps

Up all night with my child;
Sleep eludes, frustration builds;
Dawn brings new hope.

Daughter is in swing;
Praying she will go to sleep;
Momma needs to nap.

Little child of mine;
Your medicine is yellow;
And now so am I

Battling doctors;
And insurance - fiercesome foes;
Worse than space pirates

Two Weeks of Hell

I did everything I could think of to prepare for having a child. But nothing prepared me for those first two weeks. Here's what little wisdom I was able to learn from them.

1. No matter what you do, the child will cry and you will not be able to soothe her. This is not your fault and you are not a bad parent.

2. The child is incredibly demanding (see the title of this blog!). You will not be able to meet every need, every single time. You are not a bad parent.

3. You will not be able to figure out her needs at times, no matter what you do. You are not a bad parent.

4. Breastfeeding hurts at first, especially with an inexperienced first time mom. There will be times when you don't think you will be able to get through the pain. You are not a bad parent.

5. If you choose to use formula, either for supplementation as I do or full time, it's OKAY. Millions of us were raised on formula. I turned out fine as did most of the rest of us. Whatever is best for you and your baby is the best thing. Breastfeeding is wonderful, but having a mommy who isn't stressed, crying and/or in pain is even better. You are not a bad parent.

6. There WILL be times when you find yourself resenting and disliking your child. You love her, you just don't LIKE her at that particular time. This is totally normal, especially for first time parents. This little person is depriving you of sleep, food, time with your spouse, and in short everything that makes life enjoyable. Resentment is a pretty reasonable reaction. You are not a bad parent. Trust me, it gets better and it all becomes worthwhile the first time she smiles at you.

7. You will accidentally let her flop over onto her face, or bump a foot as you carry her through a doorway, or something. You are not a bad parent. Obviously we all try to never ever let these happen, but we aren't perfect. Babies are tougher than you think.

8. You will get upset and yell or walk away, and later discover that the child was hungry, or not feeling well, etc. You are not a bad parent. You are new to this and you are still figuring things out. You will make mistakes. As long as you learn from them, you are doing the best that you can. You are not perfect.

9. You will probably need to walk away at some point. You are not a bad parent. Put the baby in her crib, bassinet, etc - anywhere safe, and walk away. I don't believe in letting them cry it out, but there are times when you really have no alternative. For your sanity, and for the safety of the child, you will need to walk away and let her cry. Take five minutes to do some deep breathing and probably some crying yourself. You'll be better for it.

10. If you thought your emotions ran high during pregnancy, it's nothing compared to the emotions of the first two weeks. Remind yourself that your hormones are changing more rapidly now than any other time, and that you are highly stressed. Find someone to talk to - friends, groups online, a helpline, any one. But talk to someone. Frequently. If anyone becomes negative or makes you feel worse, avoid them for now and search for others. This will pass, I promise you.

11. Remember that you will be recovering physically from delivery. As much as possibly, rely on others during this time. Take people up on their offers to help. Let the housework slide. Your job is to recover and take care of the baby. That's it. Order take out for dinner. Buy groceries that you can just boil or microwave. Have meals pre-cooked and frozen so you can just pop them in the microwave.

Above all else, remind yourself of these facts
You aren't perfect, so don't hold yourself to that standard.
This will pass.
It will get better.
Yes, it will be worth it.
You are not a bad parent.

Never Say Thank You

There's a Celtic belief that, when dealing with the Gentle Folk (fae, faeries, elves, call them what you will) one should never say Thank You. It's seen as an insult - to accept a gift or help and then dismiss it with two simple words. Appreciation deserves more words, and specific ones.

I have a habit of not wanting to inconvenience people, so I often won't take them up on their offers of help. Her Miniscule Majesty is teaching me to accept these offers in the spirit in which they are offered, and to take the freakin' help.

I've had friends answer my frantic and probably ridiculous questions through email, facebook and over the phone. They've encouraged me every time I hit a rough patch, commiserated with me when I complained and cheered over the small victories.

One friend drove an hour to see me the day after minor surgery and spent the day holding Her Supreme Smallness, so I could actually get some housework finished.

Another drove an hour through pouring rain and cooked up a big batch of veggie shepard's pie for me, so I'd have meals I could just microwave. She put the portions in the freezer, cleaned the kitchen, and took out the trash.

My mother and father drove 10 hours to see us. They cooked breakfast, lunch and dinner all weekend, cleaned my house, bullied me into taking naps, and watched her while my husband and I had our first night out together since the arrival of the Diminutive Dictator.

My in-laws are coming up next weekend for our birthdays and have offered to watch Her Powerful Petiteness so my husband and I can have a birthday dinner together.

Two other friends are organizing a belated baby shower for me, and juggling a list of invited people that, for the most part, they've never met. They already attended a surprise baby shower that my online friends held at a Con that we went to. And a friend/close colleague had a shower for me at my job. And of course there's everyone who's attended/will attend.

All of these people have made me feel loved, have picked me up when I needed support, have encouraged me when I was feeling low and shared the joy. I've needed them and they've been there for me. It's been yet another humbling experience.
As important as they are, the two words "thank you" aren't enough to express my gratitude. All I can do is to accept the help, and earnestly say that if any of you need me, just ask. I'll be there. No thanks necessary.

Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes

I can't believe how quickly she's growing, and the changes that have happened already.

She outgrew the Newborn sized clothes in her first week.
She's gained 2 pounds and 1.5 inches.
Her face looks different - less scrunched together.
Her hair is lighter.
She has somewhat better control of her arms and legs.
I think she's discovering her hands - she's sucked on her fingers and thumbs a few times.
Her sleeping patterns have changed.
She's more alert.
She really LOOKS at us now.
She's interested in the world around her.
She's starting to coo and make noises other than crying.
Her cries have changed from that newborn squall to actual crying.
She's starting to have different cries, although I haven't been able to decipher them to know if they have different meanings yet.

She smiles at us. That is amazing. I can't describe the feeling it causes in me, except that in that instant, I would do anything for her, and everything I've gone through suddenly isn't important. Only she is.

Is it worth it?

Completely. I look down at her as she sleeps on my shoulder, so trusting. It is the most humbling experience of my life. Suddenly nothing else seems important, except to take care of this tiny being. I look at her and realize what an amazing thing this is, that we created a life. And now this life depends on me for everything. She trusts me that much.

I spend hours just staring at her. And when she smiles at me, my heart swells. And yes, it's worth it.